


Bound

by Jere_emy_Lee_Yo



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Acceptance, Binding Related Injuries (Mention), Clary is not amused, Coming Out, Everyone else is barely here, Gen, Happy Ending, Light Angst, Simon and Clary are the mains, Simon binds for too long, Takes place before S01E08, Trans Male Character, Trans Simon Lewis, binding, unsafe binding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-08 21:03:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14702268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jere_emy_Lee_Yo/pseuds/Jere_emy_Lee_Yo
Summary: After wearing his binder for too long, Simon is forced into an uncomfortable spot. Does he come out to these near-strangers, or does he continue to put his health at risk?...(sounds way angstier than it really is i promise)





	Bound

**Author's Note:**

> Trans!Simon fic because I needed it This is honestly self-indulgent trash. Takes place before S01E08, so no vampire Simon. I love vamp Simon, but vampires don't breathe, so I suppose he could bind for as long as he wanted. Btw, it's been over a year since I watched season one, so I don't really remember the timeline? Hopefully it's okay? (also the POV keeps changing bc im trash s o r r y)

Something was wrong with Simon. 

He had been behaving oddly all day, snapping at people, not making his usual jokes. He had even been brusque with Clary, which was a rare occurrence. 

Clary watched him out of the corner of her eye, under the pretense of examining a book for more information about Valentine. Clary and Simon had been best friends for years; she, above all people, should surely be able to work out what was bothering him so much. 

It was only because she was watching so closely that she noticed his slight wince as his hands went up, tugging at something just above his hips, back arching as if he were trying to stretch sore muscles. 

_He hasn’t been injured, has he?_ Clary wondered, eyeing his pained grimace with concern. She was just about to voice her question when it suddenly hit her. _Oh._

And suddenly, she was angry. If she had been in a better mood, she probably would have pulled him aside before confronting him. As it was, she barely even hesitated. 

“Simon Lewis!” she exclaimed in her best imitation of her mother. Simon started, hands falling from where they had been tugging at something under his T-shirt. Jace glanced at her with his eyebrows raised, copying the confused look she received from Izzy. Alec glanced up at her too, though he largely looked bored. 

“Uh…what did I do?” Simon asked looking confused and a bit worried. His hands fell again to his hips and resumed their downwards tug. 

This irritated Clary even further. _As if he doesn’t know exactly what he did._ “Si, how long have you been wearing your binder?”

She could tell that she was right about her assumption as his face paled and his arms crossed defensively over his chest. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Clary,” he snapped, eyes darting around the room, from Clary, to Jace, to Izzy, to Alec, and back to Clary. 

“Simon, come on. We’ve been best friends since we were children. I know when something’s wrong. Please just tell me the truth.”

Simon caught her eyes from across the room and she held contact calmly, trying her best to communicate that she understood. She knew if she pushed too hard, Simon would just close off completely. He considered her for a few moments, before sighing his defeat and raking a hand through his hair, evidently conceding to Clary’s will. 

“I put it on yesterday before class,” he muttered, dropping his eyes. The last thing he wanted was to see Clary’s disappointment. He heard her gasp, and he glanced up to see her with a hand over her mouth. His eyes slowly slipped back down to the floor. 

Clary recovered quickly, anger and concern overcoming her shock. “You’ve been wearing that thing since nine in the morning _yesterday_?” she raged. “Simon, it’s been over thirty-six hours! You know you’re not supposed to wear it for more than eight hours at a time.” _No wonder he’s in so much pain_ she thought, somewhat guiltily. _His ribs have got to be killing him. How did I not notice sooner?_

“Yeah, Clary, I know that. But I haven’t been home since and I can’t exactly whip it off here in front of everyone,” Simon all but growled, looking angry and embarrassed, arms crossed tightly. 

“Uh, I hate to interrupt…whatever this is,” Jace piped up, shooting confused looks at Clary and Simon, “but what exactly is going on here?” 

“That’s none of your _fucking_ business, Wayland,” Simon snarled at him to the surprise of everyone. Even Alec looked vaguely caught off guard. Jace stood, looking murderously at Simon, but sat back down when Clary placed a hand on his shoulder, silently shaking her head. Simon himself just looked miserable, guilty and angry and in pain. 

Clary walked over to him and stroked the side of his face, forcing him to look into her eyes. “Si, I know you don’t want to, but you have got to take that thing off. You’re hurting yourself. Don’t you remember all those side-effects the doctor mentioned?” 

Simon nodded, seemingly in defeat. “But Clary, I can’t take it off here. Not in front of them. Please don’t make me,” he all but begged. Clary felt her heart break in her chest, anger building alongside it. Anger for herself at what she was about to do to Simon. Anger at the world for breaking Simon down like this. Anger at Jace, Izzy, and Alec just for being there. 

“I know. I’m so sorry Simon. But I can’t let you hurt yourself like this.” Clary turned to Izzy, giving her a slightly desperate look and beckoning her over. Izzy was across the room in what felt like seconds and Clary pulled her down to whisper in her ear. Whatever she said made Izzy’s eyes widen, and she gazed at Simon with newfound sympathy. 

Izzy grabbed Simon by the hand and all but dragged him out of the meeting room and in the direction of her bedroom. As soon as the door shut behind them, Jace whirled on Clary. “What was all that about?” he demanded, but Clary stood tall. 

“I’m sorry Jace, but it’s not my place to tell you.” Jace sputtered a bit, but Clary ignored him, sitting back down and making a show of being completely engrossed in her book. 

Before too long, the meeting-room door opened, and Izzy and Simon returned. Jace scrutinized the Mundane, trying to determine the cause of Clary’s concern. Simon looked humiliated and dejected, face flushing dark red and eyes on the floor. Tucked into his underarm was a bit of rolled up nude fabric and his arms were crossed over his chest, tightly and defensively. That’s when Jace noticed. Though well hidden by a baggy hoody and crossed arms, Simon’s chest was definitely bigger than usual, poking out as if he had- _oh no way._

“Dude, you have boobs?” Jace blurted out, and immediately knew that was the worst thing he could have said. Simon blushed even darker, if such a thing were possible, and his arms tightened further over his chest. Clary’s lips tightened as she leveled him with a murderous look. “Uh, sorry,” he offered, somewhat awkwardly. “I didn’t mean anything bad by it. I just don’t really get it?” He glanced over at Alec, who looked just as confused, and felt a little better that he wasn’t the only one that didn’t understand. 

Simon, looking resigned, opened his mouth to explain before Isabelle cut in. “Simon, you don’t have to tell them if you don’t want to. They can live without knowing.” He shot her a grateful smile, then squared his shoulders, face hard. 

“Thanks, Isabelle. But I might as well. They’ve already seen.” He looked between Alec and Jace, gaze hard, almost challenging, and said, “I’m a trans man.” 

Jace blinked. Alec raised his eyebrows. They looked at each other, then back at Simon, who looked nervous, but also defiant, like he was waiting for their reaction.

“I have no idea what that means,” Alec confessed, breaking the awkward silence that had settled over the room. Simon deflated. This was always the most uncomfortable part of coming out, trying to explain it to people who could never truly understand. 

“Basically, when I was born, I was assigned female,” Simon explained. “The doctors, my parents, everyone thought I was a girl. But they were wrong.” At this he paused, glancing between Jace and Alec as if he expected an argument or questions. “So basically, I’ve spent the last few years correcting this mistake. Unfortunately, I haven’t been able to fix this particular thing yet.”

Jace took a few moments to absorb this knowledge, and then he shrugged. “Yeah okay,” he said. Alec already looked bored again and turned back to his book. 

“Wait, that’s it?” Simon asked, uncrossing his arms and dropping them to his sides in his shock. 

“Yeah. That’s it. Get back to work, Mundane.” And with that, Jace turned back to his book and continued his reading. He missed the relief in Simon’s eyes, the pride in Clary and Izzy’s. 

It wasn’t such a big deal, after all. Some people are born different.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! This is based on my own experience as a trans man, so hopefully it makes sense?? ALSO: please please please don't be like Simon here. They tell you not to bind for more than eight hours for a reason. Take it from someone who has broken his ribs before by binding too tightly for too long. It's not worth it guys. Anyway. If you enjoyed, please leave me a comment or a kudos. I love getting your feedback. Also please feel free to point out any errors!


End file.
